Annacdotes 23

At her cousins' birthday party. (And, for the record, my punctuation is correct. Her cousins are twins.)

This look instigated some serious discussions about her being a bird for Halloween.

1. I was flipping through a magazine at the table the other day and Anna caught sight of a bright pink advertisement for crystal light raspberry lemonade. She was bedazzled by the splash of color and wanted to know what it was about. When I told her what Crystal Light was, she said, "It doesn't sound so great, but it looks great on the page." In one sentence, I think she just captured the essence of advertising.

2. Anna's words to the famous "Mr. Sandman" song? "Mr. Salmon, bring me a drink."

3. She still says "conbersation" sometimes. And "inbitation."

4. One morning Anna was up early playing in her room. When she finally made it into mine, she was dressed up in her superhero cape and mask and needed help putting on her arm cuffs. She said she wasn't a superhero, though, but a super fast delivery person. I loved that.


She had also packed a huge bag that she was using for her deliveries, I guess, and she said, "I have like a thousand stuff in here."

Good thing she looks like a solid 10 years old here. Geez...

5. Anna's 9-year-old cousin was over one day, and he made himself a missionary tag out of a post-it note. (His said "Elder Hobo," which delighted me.) Anyway, Anna wanted in on the action and hers said, "Elder Sister Banks." I just liked that.

6. After a prayer, Anna said thoughtfully, "Does Jesus say, 'In the name of I'?"

7. After she stumbled over the dishwasher door that was down, she said vehemently, "That dishwasher is my enemy!" Then, after a moment, she said more calmly, ". . . but also my hero." When I asked her why, she said, "Well, it tripped me, but I could also use it as a seat!"

8. Typing a name into this and then watching the ensuing personalized song (never mind that it's about tampons) is one of Anna's favorite things to do, so much so that she'll use it as a way to put off going to bed. One night, she begged and pleaded for one more and finally convinced me to let her when she said she would pick a funny name. She chose Phyllis, and we giggled the whole way through.

At the rodeo. I'm glad to see my finger and that she was dressed for the occasion.

9. Saying goodnight one evening, Anna said she loved me SO much and that I was right up there with her blanket, Silky Silky Blanket.

The first procedure we had done to start Anna on her way to competing in child pageants. I think it looks really good, don't you? (Okay, okay. So it was a bee sting in the worst place ever.)

Stiches

It was summer, and I was 8. I was riding bikes with my sister along a main road that connected to my neighborhood. I decided to try some lame trick, and I crashed my bike, cutting open my right knee in the process. When I stood up (in the middle of the road), my sister took one look at my knee and said, "Yep, you're going to need stitches." Luckily, no cars came while we were in the middle of the road.

The cut was bleeding a little, there were little bits of gravel inside, and the whole site was pretty gory. I couldn't bend my knee without it hurting, so I had to walk my bike home, hobbling slowly. My sister walked her bike home too so that I wouldn't be alone.

I showed the wound to my mother and she agreed: stitches it would need. So off to the ER we went. I remember laying on the table while the doctor cleaned the grisly mess. After most of the rocks were out, he used a little hose to clean out the nooks and crannies. He said he was "irrigating." Having water sprayed into my body was something I had never felt before, and it actually felt amazing. They also had to cut out some tissue that was pretty messed up. Honestly, it looked like a little brain with some blood on it. (Sorry for all the gore. This post should be rated PG-13.) Strangely, that didn't really hurt either.

But then he had to deaden my knee before he stitched it up, and those shots hurt the very most. "Like little bee stings," the nurse aptly explained. Yes. Thank you.

Once I was stitched up, they had to fit me for a brace to wear for a month so that I wouldn't bend my knee and rip the stitches out. They molded the brace to the back of my leg and then wrapped the whole thing in a bandage. I picked a hot pink one. I can't believe they even had a hot pink one. I guess those doctors were totally up with the times.

So I wore this brace for a month, doing some more hobbling around since I couldn't bend my knee. I'm pretty sure my whole family made fun of me. (Try walking around with one leg straightened the whole time. You'll look awesome.) We also took a trip to Lake Powell in the middle of the month and, luckily, I could take the brace off and swim. But I had to put this salve on and bandage myself back up the minute I got out of the water.

When I got the stitches out, I remember my mom saying, "Well, you'll never be a leg model." Yes. Thanks. I also remember the doctor giving me a couple of suckers. Totally worth it.

And that is the story of how I got stitches. I think maybe because my right knee has less tissue to cushion it, it is more sensitive. And so, like an old arthritic lady, I am always reminded of the stitches and the suckers and the hot pink bandage every time it rains.

Happy 4th of July!

Lunch style.

Which nine states would you keep?